Freeing the Doomed
by Sanoon
Summary: In a disconected world, there lies a group of characters. All of whom, are kept as personal slaves. Another group is trusted to rescue them. A very powerful, very angry black mage, and a ball of meat. A jointfic by AnimeFreak84 and myself. Insanity inside
1. It Begins

Hello everyone, and welcome for a truly weird story. This is going to be one hell of a cross-over fic. Also, for everyone who is disappointed because of AnimeFreak84's halt in writing, then you will be enthralled about this fic. Why? Because it is a foint-fic between her an me. This story will be an Azumanga Daioh/Invader Zim/Aqua Teen Hunger Force crossover. There will ALSO be plenty of OC characters. Including Black Mage (From my FF Tactics story, which has nothing to do with FF Tactics) and Pix, and Irken outcast. (My OC Irken) It shouldn't be too hard to find out who wrote which parts of the story. Enough stalling, enjoy the fic.

Disclaimer – We (Sanoon and AnimeFreak84) Do not own any of the character from any of the shows. However, AnimeFreak owns Zim's kids, and Sanoon owns Black Mages great personality skills and Pix. Everyone else goes to their respective owners.

* * *

Freeing the Doomed  
A joint-fic by Sanoon and AnimeFreak84

Chapter 1: It begins…

It was a 'normal' Saturday in the household of a very strange teenage girl named Antasia, who lives in Florida. DAMN THAT LUCKY BITCH! Lol! Anywhoozle, it was the afternoon and she was having her slave-bitches, Tallest Red and Zoey busting their asses while their daughter, Momoko, watched.

"OH, WINSTON! GET ME A FUCKING SANDWICH!" Antasia commanded.

"ZIP IT, PSYCHO BITCH! I ALREADY GOT IT COVERED!" Tallest Red snapped, shoving the plate with peanut butter and jelly sandwich at her. It was her favorite kind.

"I WANT ANOTHER FIVE MORE, GODDAMNIT! AND TELL ME YOU'LL DO SO IN ITALIAN!" she said.

Tallest Red counted to ten in his head before he gave Antasia a plastic smile, while curling his hand up into a fist. "Chiuda in su e muoia! BWEH" (Shut up and die! BWEH!) He shouted to her, sticking his tongue out at her in at the last part like a little kid on those anime shows do when they're pissed off. He went to go get her five more sandwiches, which is her favorite food, besides pasta, cake, popcorn and chocolate.

Antasia laughed evilly and turned to Zoey. "AND YOU, MADONNA! TURN ON THE TV AND CHANGE THE CHANEL BY HAND NINE HUNDRED TIMES! AND TELL ME YOU'LL DO SO IN SWEDISH!" She commanded.

Zoey growled and gritted her teeth. "Jag hata du med en lidelse!" (I hate you with a passion!) She spat at her master, causing her to laugh more.

(Authors Note: I knew the Swedish one. A friend taught me it. I had to look up how to translate 'Shut up and die!' in Italian. Which is weird because I'm not Swedish...but I'm Italian. Ha! Lol!)

"HOT DAMN! HAVING YOU TWO FOR SLAVES IS AWESOME!" Antasia screamed.

"Damn! Damn! Damn! Damn! DAMMN!" Momoko squealed, happily.

Tallest Red and Zoey were living god-awful lives in this house. Ever since Antasia abducted them...they've been forced to carry out her every command for hours and hours and hours everyday.

And...

They weren't even getting paid!

DUN...DUN...DUN!

Their two-year-old daughter however, was living a great life. Antasia's not THAT mean to make a toddler be her slave-bitch! She had a little, fragmented piece of a heart somewhere in her body, believe it or not.

While Tallest Red was done making the second peanut butter and jelly sandwich, someone busted in through the window of the kitchen wearing a ski mask.

It was Tallest Purple.

"P-PUR? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU-" Tallest Red shouted, shocked.

"HA! I KNEW I got the right house! BET YOU FEEL STUPID NOW, DON'T YOU, YOTSUBA-CHAN?" Tallest Purple shouted in a cocky voice.

Yotsuba, who was also wearing a ski mask, tumbled through the window. "Aww, BARNACLES!" she said, snapping her fingers in disappointment.

Then Yotsuba looked at Tallest Red and blushed. She could barely contain herself any longer and glomped him!

"OH, RED! I MISSED YOU SO GODDAMN MUCH!" Yotsuba said, sobbing from happiness.

"I MISSED YOUR DAILY, HORRIFYING GLOMPING!" Tallest Red shouted, also sobbing from happiness.

"WHY ARE WE SCREAMING ALL THIS SHIT?" Tallest Purple shouted, confused.

Then Antasia came in the room.

"Oh! What have we got here?" she said, with a smirk on her face.

Later on, Yotsuba and Tallest Purple were dressed in French maid outfits like Tallest Red and Zoey.

"Tallest Purple, your new name is Amy and Yotsuba, your new name is Ricardo! You two will be my other slave-bitches! You got me?" Antasia said.

"WHY DO I HAVE TO BE NAMED AMY?" Tallest Purple asked.

"BECAUSE I FUCKING SAID SO, JERK!" Antasia retorted.

"WHY DO WE ALL HAVE TO SCREAM?" Zoey questioned.

"I LOVE MY NEW NAME! IT. ROCKS. ASS!" Yotsuba yelled.

"IT DOES NOT, YOTSUBA-CHAN, YOU DING-DONG!" Tallest Red screamed.

"BITCH! BITCH! BITCH! BITCH! BITCH!" Momoko said.

They all looked at the two year old with disturbed faces.

Little did Antasia know at the time that Tallest Red sent out a distress signal, hoping that someone would come to rescue him.

* * *

In a small crappy town called Wauseon, located in Ohio, a teenager was sitting in front of his computer, writing a small document, when a man in blue robes walked into his room. His yellow eyes were glowing brightly, and since you couldn't see his face, observing his eyes is the only way to know if he was angry or happy. It's usually the first. 

"Travis, the games already starting," he said in a quite, angry voice. "Are you even going to come down and play?"

"Ohh, the game started?" Travis asked without even directing his attention towards the man in the room. "What game?"

"Halo 2," the man replied.

"Who's playin'?" Travis asked.

"Me, Meatwad, and Pix," the man replied.

"Ehh…all right," Travis replied. "I'll be down in a minute, Black Mage."

Black Mage walked out of the room, and headed for the basement. Travis closed word, and checked his E-mail account one last time. He had a message. It was from someone simply entitled, 'Tallests'. He clicked on it and read the message. "Tallest Red and Purple have been captured," Travis whispered to himself. "Please help me. I am being held captive in a high-class housing complex called 'The Trails' in Ormond Beach, Florida." After a few seconds of though, Travis mumbled, "Well that's strange." Travis moved the mouse and clicked on the reply button.

'Hello Red and Purple,' Travis thought as he typed it out. 'I will help you only if you give me what I want. I'll also need your phone number so I can contact you,' and clicked, Send. He smiled as he put his computer on stand-by and rushed off to the basement for some Halo goodness.

* * *

Sanoon – How's that for ya? More to come soon. For those who liked, review please. Ohh, and flames will be useless. 

AnimeFreak84 – Don't bother flaming me. I won't read it. Oh yeah! I hope you don't need a psychologist after this! lol! lol!


	2. Emails and Dinner

Once upon a time, there was a man…a man who had a donut. It was a powerful donut, that donut. So powerful, that he exploded under the sheer pressure of its power when he ate it. The end. Wasn't that a great story? Well, here's another story. Enjoy.

Disclaimer – We (Sanoon and AnimeFreak84 and Ikemen) Do not own any of the character from any of the shows. However, AnimeFreak84 owns Zim's kids, and Sanoon owns Black Mages great personality skills and Pix. Everyone else goes to their respective owners.

* * *

Freeing the Doomed  
A joint-fic by Sanoon and AnimeFreak84 and Ikemen

Chapter 2: Emails and Dinner

The next day, Tallest Red looked at the e-mail and read it out loud. Tallest Purple was standing behind him.

"Hello Red and Purple. I will help you only if you give me what I want. Ill also need your phone number so I can contact you.". Tallest Purple got confused.

"But...what would he want? That's my problem. He SHOULD tell us what he wants!" Tallest Purple stated.

Tallest Red turned sharply to him. "Who the hell cares what the kid wants? DAMN IT! He's the only one who can help us right now! So you BETTER do your part of this, whatever it may be! And look at it this way, you'll never see Miyuki again and you'll never eat another fucking donut if you don't! And who the fuck knows what Antasia could do to us one day! WE MAY DIE IN THIS SHIT HOLE!"

Tallest Purple shuddered and pushed Tallest Red out of the way. He typed,

Dear Travis,

WE'LL DO WHATEVER YOU WANT! WE'LL EVEN MAKE YOU THE THIRD TALLEST AND GIVE YOU YOUR OWN ARMY! JUST GET US OUT OF HERE! I WANT MY DONUTS! Oh...and Miyuki too. BUT THE DONUTS, DAMN IT! THE DONUTS! I. MUST. HAVE. THE. DONUTS!

-T.P.

Tallest Red rolled his eyes. "That's ALL you care about, don't you. Donuts...you're the king of idiots, you know that?".

Tallest Purple smirked and said, "Well, Mr. Sarcasm, I should say the same about you screwing that Zoey of yours like there's no tomorrow! I mean, do you wanna be like our father in law?". Tallest Red screamed at that.

"NO WAY IN HELL! NO! NO! NO! NO! OH GOD, NO! YAH, NO! I'M SCARED! I DON'T WANT THAT MANY CHILDREN! NO! HAVING ONE ADORABLE LITTLE TERROR RUNNING AROUND AND TWO MORE ON THE WAY IS ENOUGH, GODDAMNIT! I DON'T EVEN THINK I CAN HANDLE THREE KIDS! I'M GUNNA FREAKIN' DIE, PUR! MY OWN CHILDREN WILL BE THE DEATH OF ME! OYVEY...I AM NOT READY FOR THIS!" Tallest Red said in a crazed frenzy.

"Heh! Heh! Then either use condoms or cut down on the sex there, buddy boy." Tallest Purple said, trying not to crack up.

Tallest Red blushed and smacked Tallest Purple across the face.

"SHOVE IT!" Tallest Red screamed.

"Jesus Christ! Take a joke!" Tallest Purple retorted.

"WINSTON! MARY! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?" a voice called from up the stairs. The Tallests moaned and left the room, going back to their slave work.

Meanwhile, Zim and Davis were in Zim's car looking for everyone.

"Hey! THAT'S YOTSUBA!" Davis screamed, pointing to the window of Antasia 's house.

"Ahh! Shit! That bitch caught them too? DAMN IT! Motomiya, let's go kick that stink beast's ass!" Zim said.

The two men bursted into the house, but fell in a cleverly planted pitch fall in the ground. Antasia smirked and growled, "Excellent." Zim and Davis glared at her, but to no avail...

Later on, her other slave-bitches were called in and were shocked to see Zim and Davis, now in the same French maid outfits. Osaka, who had been captured by Antasia soon after Yotsuba and Tallest Purple were, gasped.

"Zimmy-kun...Davis...oh shit! Not you too!"

"Osa-chan?" Zim said, surprised. He thought Osaka was on a business trip, but Antasia 's lackey, Rachel, caught her just as she was getting on the plane and she's been stuck here ever since.

"Long story..." Osaka sighed.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE WE WEARING THESE FOR?" Davis screamed at Antasia.

"You two are my new slave-bitches! Zim, your new name is Annastasia Beaverhausen and Davis, your new name is Sha-Nay-Nay LaToya! DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT?" Antasia hollered at her new slave-bitches.

Zim cocked an imaginary Irken eyebrow. "Hold on one sec. My new name is 'Annastasia Beaverhausen'...YOU GOT THAT FROM WILL & GRACE!" he said.

"No comment..." Antasia said, embarrassed.

"BITCH! BITCH! BITCH! BITCH! BITCH!" Momoko sang, happily.

Osaka growled and slapped Tallest Red and Zoey.

"THANKS FOR TEACHING MY GRANDDAUGHTER THAT WORD!" she shouted, angrily.

"Mom! I didn't teach her that and neither did Red!" Zoey said.

"It was HER!" Tallest Red said, pointing at Antasia. Everyone stared at her.

"Ohh! Big fucking deal! NOW...GET BACK TO WORK!" she barked.

Everyone glared at her and went on doing their jobs while she laughed evilly.

* * *

Travis sat at his computer, reading a message he had recently received. 'Third Tallest,' he thought. 'Give me my own army? Donuts? Who are these crack heads? Hey, look, they actually sent me the phone number. Haha. Those guys are really serious.' 

"Hey," came Meatwad's voice. "What'r ya doin'?"

"Ohh," Travis replied glancing over to the giant ball of meat at his door. "I'm just checking out this email."

"Ohh, well, I wus just wonderin', 'cause I wanted to see if you were going to make somethin' to eat, 'cause I was gettin' hungry."

"Tell ya what, Meatwad," Travis said, turning away from his computer. "I'll make you something to eat if you tell me where Black Mage is."

"Oh, dat' boy is out back with Pix makin' magic," Meatwad replied.

"Making magic…" Travisrepeatedslowly, until a thought dawned on him. "Crap!" He shouted as he ran to the sunroom to take a look outside. "Black Mage! Don't…" Travis started to shout out the door, but stopped when he saw Black Mage trying to teach Pix how to control fire, to no avail. The two stopped and stared at Travis in confusion, but then just shrugged and went back to what they were doing.

"You gonna make me that dinner now?" Meatwad asked as he rolled into the room.

"Meatwad…" Travis started slowly, "…you really need to learn proper English."

"Ya, I do, but Frylock did his best with me, ya know what I mean?"

"Really?" Travis said unimpressed. "Say, Meatwad, I'm going to make you that dinner right after I think of what I want from a few desperate leaders. Alright?"

"Yeah, that sounds good alright, but I'll tell you what sounds like a better plan. If you fix me that dinner right now."

"Fine," Travis replied after staring at Black Mage and Pix for a few seconds. "I'll make you some food right now, but youoweme."

"Okay, that's fine," Meatwad replied. The two departed for the kitchen, as Black Mage lit the neighbor's tree on fire for demonstrative purposes.

* * *

Sanoon – The story progresses slowly. Prepare for something…something…something…I don't know. 

AnimeFreak84 and Ikemen - Well, review! Duh! Hope ya'll keep enjoyin' it!


	3. Phone Calls and Singing

If you thought the other chapters made sense, then you have not yet been beaten senseless by a pack of three legged pixie-wolves. If you are one of those people with a sense of reality left, then lock your doors and windows. The pixie-wolves are coming tonight! This chapter has a song by Van Halen, called Sinner's Swing. Enjoy.

Disclaimer – We (Sanoon and AnimeFreak84) Do not own any of the character from any of the shows. However, AnimeFreak owns Zim's kids, and Sanoon owns Black Mages great personality skills and Pix. Everyone else goes to their respective owners.

* * *

Freeing the Doomed  
A joint-fic by Sanoon and AnimeFreak84 and Ikemen

Chapter 4: Phone Calls and Singing

A phone rings in a house located in Florida. A lone, tall, green figure in a maid's outfit moved quickly to pick up the phone. "Hello," Red started, "you've reached the house of Antasia. How can I help you?"

There was a moment of silence, which Red started to assume was because it was another telemarketer. He was about to hang up the phone, until he heard a small voice come from the speaker. "Hello? Hey there, ugh, is…Tallest Red around?" Came a childish-like voice.

Red looked around the room to make sure Antasia or anyone else wasn't around. "You're speaking to him," Red replied quietly.

"Oh, oh that's good," the caller replied. "Ugh, I'm calling on behalf of…the…Travis…residence."

"You mean he got my message?" Red blurted out in surprise before he caught himself. Luckily, no one came to inspect his sudden outburst.

"Yeah, yeah, ugh, I was just calling to tell you that he has accepted to help you under the following conditions," the caller said as if he had tried to memorize a speech.

"Okay," Red said slowly. "What are they?"

"First off, you haf' ta give a planet to Travis so he can rule and other things…a-and there has to be a moon. He says dat I can have the moon."

"Okay, okay. I can do that." Red said quickly and quietly. The last thing he needed was for Antasia or any of her cronies to came in.

"He also wants a…'frickin' awesome spaceship tailored to his every whim'…or somethin'," the caller said in a confused tone. "Somethin' like that."

"Ugh…I think I can do that," Red replied.

"And, he wants a selection of girls to meet. He says dat they have to be Irken, and dat they have to like humans, or else it'll never work."

"…okay," was Red's slow reply.

"He also wants your eternal thanks and…something else I don't remember."

"Do I have too?" Red asked unhappily.

"Yes," the voice replied calmly.

"Friggin' crap," was Red's only reply.

"Give me that," another voice said. It was very different. Instead of a childish-like voice, it was quieter, and more aggravated. "Hello…good…ahh…listen…now that you have accepted all of these conditions, we can rescue you. When do you want to be rescued?"

"Now would be nice," Red replied quickly. "Who knows how long before that tramp returns."

"Well, dat might take a while," the first voice said, "'cause we have to travel from Ohio to Florida in the danger cart. Dat's gonna take a while."

"Do you have anything faster?" Red asked.

"Yes…wait…no. We'll be there in a month."

"NO!" Red shouted. "WAIT, NOOO!" Red heard the other line hang up. "Crap," He whispered to himself, drooping his head.

* * *

Later that day, Osaka was cleaning the bathroom. She sighed. "Damn…how long ahm ah gunna have ta keep cleanin' this here house? Why won't Antasia just set us free?" she said to herself, in a gloomy way. 

Just then, Zim walked in and he shut the door behind him.

"Oh? What is it, Zimmy-kun?" Osaka quietly asked her Irken husband of twenty-six years.

"That little fucker Antasia has two more slave-bitches!" Zim said.

Osaka dropped her sponge.

"What…but who?" she questioned.

Zim sighed and said, "You're not going to believe this, but she captured Rini! She heard that you were caught and she tried to save you! And then Squee heard and she caught him too."

Osaka stood up and looked at Zim, horrified. Her best female friend and her grandson were captured? This was too much for the poor woman! She gripped her head with her hands. "Why the fuck…why?" she asked, looking as she was about to start to cry.

"Osa-chan…" Zim said, softly. He took Osaka in his arms and they kissed. Their kiss got a bit passionate and then they…umm...yeah…AHEM!

Meanwhile in the kitchen, Antasia was forcing Tallest Red, Rini, Yotsuba and Squee to make sandwiches for her.

"BWAHAHAHAHA! Keep making them, bitches!" Antasia said, smirking evilly.

"GO TO HELL!" Rini screamed.

Antasia went up to the Japanese woman and whacked her across the face. Tallest Red, Yotsuba and Squee stopped what they where doing and stared.

"Don't fucking talk, Victor! I NEVER GAVE YOU PERMISSION TO SPEAK!"

"Yes, master," Rini muttered, acrimoniously.

Antasia smirked and left the room. She actually left the house to spend some time with her best friend. Tallest Red grabbed a china plate and smashed it against the wall.

"DAMN THIS FUCKING SHIT!" he shouted angrily.

"Red-kun! Antasia's gunna catch you!" Yotsuba said.

"Mom's SQUEE right, dad!" Squee said, worriedly. As their future son from an alternate dimension, he was especially worried about Tallest Red.

"I DON'T FUCKING CARE ANYMORE, SQUEEGEE! I I'D DO ANYTHING TO GET THAT SON OF A BITCH

KILLED! ANYTHING!" Tallest Red screamed.

"Wow. I thought Zim was the one with anger problems," Rini said, slightly amused.

Then Yotsuba began laughing. Everyone stared at her.

"Wouldn't it be funny if Bert and Ernie got so high off of smoking weed that they walked out into the middle of the street and got ran over by some drunk Hungarian homosexual ex-convict man in a car?" Yotsuba asked, spontaneously.

"WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?" Tallest Red screamed at her, throwing his hands in the air.

"I dunno. But it would be funny! Maybe Bert would loose the uni-brow!"

"O-kay. Maybe Osaka's right about you getting her randomness," Rini told Yotsuba.

Yotsuba shrugged. She's been compared to her mother a lot. Then Squee began singing.

"All right, you sinners, swing! Danger in the rearview mirror. There's trouble in the wind! Badness bringing up the rear. The menace's loose again!" Squee sang.

Tallest Red smirked and began singing.

"She looks so fuckin' good! So sexy and so frail! Something got the bite on me. I'm goin' straight to hell! And now we're wasting time. Same old pickup lines! And you keep trying! Don't waste time! Come back to your senses, baby!" Tallest Red sang.

Rini joined in.

"We can come to terms. I can almost taste it. IT BURNS! You'd be sitting pretty, but you try to take the Fifth. Wearin' out my welcome," Rini sang.

Then Yotsuba sang.

"Guess I better say my prayers. And now we're wasting time! Same old pickup lines! And you keep trying! Don't waste time! Get out and push! Get out and push! Get out and push!" Yotsuba sang.

Then they sang the rest of the song together.

"Soon you'll see my silhouette darkenin' your door! I can almost taste it! I WANT MORE! No one's above suspicion! No one's got it wired! I'll eat with my fingers! Want my iron in that fire. And now we're wasting time! Same old pickup lines! And you keep trying! Don't waste time! Get out and push! Get out and push! Get out and push!"

When they got done singing, they went off to go enjoy their time of Antasia being away.

* * *

Sanoon – For those of you who have been keeping score, that's 324 for Zim. Kudos little green buddy. (I hate you) And Squee committed a foul with too high of a voice pitch. Five point deduction. Doesn't that suck. 

AnimeFreak84 - Well, Osaka...YOU BETTER NOT GET PREGNANT! Damn! And Rini, Red, Yotsuba and Squee are starting their own band. GO BUY THIER CD!


	4. Questing and Pregnancy

Another chapter in the story that can determine the future of…a group of people. I don't know how many anymore. You decipher the truth…if you don't go insane in the process.

Disclaimer – We (Sanoon and AnimeFreak84) Do not own any of the character from any of the shows. However, AnimeFreak owns Zim's kids, and Sanoon owns Black Mages great personality skills and Pix. Everyone else goes to their respective owners.

* * *

Freeing the Doomed  
A joint-fic by Sanoon and AnimeFreak84

The real chapter 4: Questing and Pregnancy

The sun was shining, and the birds were singing. There were three people…well, actually two people and a ball of meat out on the driveway of Travis's home. There was a small wooded cart with scribbles on the side of it that said, 'Danger Cart'. The group had also installed a canvas on top of it, so any adverse weather wouldn't get annoying. Travis and Black Mage were loading the cart with cardboard boxes. Each box contained supplies that would be needed on their journey. Black Mage had packed all of the supplies, and Travis was actually curious to see what Black Mage considered 'necessary'. Most of the boxes came from Black Mage's room. Black Mage kept his door magically locked, so Travis never got to go into his room. Black Mage walked back into his house to grab some more supplies, while Meatwad just played in the front yard with Dewey, Vanessa and Boxy Brown. Travis opened up the box he was carrying, and looked at its contents. He started to pull out each item to examine them.

He pulled out safety case and opened it up. There were a few mana potions inside. Travis put the mana potions back into the box, and grabbed another one. This box had 'Do not open unless you are Black Mage' written on it. Travis opened it up, hoping for some doomsday scrolls. He was somewhat disappointed when he pulled out a magazine, which had a picture of a black mage on it. Travis assumed it was a girl, because the black mage had long hair. Travis opened up the book, and his eyes widened in surprise. "W-wow," Travis mumbled in shock after taking a few seconds to take in what he was looking at. "I didn't know Black Mage was into this type of stuff."

Travis heard the front door open, so he quickly put the magazine back into the box and shut it. Black Mage walked over to the danger cart with another box, and saw Travis just standing there. "You looked inside that box, didn't you?" Black Mage asked, pointing to the box in front of Travis.

"No, of course not," Travis lied. The look in Travis's eyes gave Black Mage his answer.

"Right, of course you didn't," Black Mage said sarcastically. He pushed the boxes to the back of the danger cart, and hopped on. "Lets see," Black Mage mumbled to himself while he observed the boxes. "Food, water, entertainment, potions, money…what else, what else?" He asked himself.

"You got the location of the address, right?" Travis asked.

"Yes, yes," Black Mage said quickly. "Say, tell me again why we're not taking your car? We could get there in a day instead of a month."

"Because Pix is taking me into space, and I don't trust your driving skills. Plus, I don't want Meatwad sitting on my dragon car seats," Travis replied.

"Why are you going into space with Pix…again?" Black Mage asked angrily. "You two have been going up there more frequently. What the hell are you two doing up there?"

"That's a secret," Travis replied quickly.

"Why the hell aren't you going?" Black Mage asked. "You're the one that agreed to help the Tallests. Why do I have to do all of the work?"

"You're not doing all of the work," Travis replied. "Meatwad is pulling the danger cart. And you're going because I have things I need to finish here."

"Of course," Black Mage replied. He took a seat in Travis's moon chair that he took from the basement and put on the danger cart. "Meatwad," Black Mage called out. "Meatwad, we're going."

Meatwad rolled over with his dolls, and put them inside the cart. "Hey, quick question," Meatwad said. "How come I have to be the one who pulls the cart?"

"Because you're the only one who can," Black Mage replied.

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Meatwad replied. He rolled over and latched himself onto the carts handles.

"Say," Black Mage said to Travis, "If Meatwad gets a moon, then what do I get?"

"Power," Travis replied. "Too bad Rouge isn't here to help. He'd love the spoils. Where is he anyway?"

"He left to find a place where he could strike it rich," Black Mage answered.

"Wonder where that is?" Travis asked.

Somewhere in Las Vegas,

"Step right up people, step right up," Rouge said to a group of people. He was dressed up as a casino dealer. "Place your bets, and lets play some craps." The man rolled his dice, and got snake eyes. "Oh, you lose," Rouge said with fake sympathy to the man. He took the man's chips, and heard the sound of someone winning a jackpot on the slots machine. "Excuse me," Rouge announced to the group of people at the craps table. "I have to use the restroom, this table will be temporarily closed." The people sighed, and left the table.

Rouge made his way over to the slots machine to play his next victim.

Back in Ohio,

"Wherever he is, I'm pretty sure he's making someone's life horrible," Black Mage commented.

"Black Mage!" An angry voice shouted from the doorway of the house. "You left the door open again!" Black Mage and Travis looked towards the doorway. An Irken, out of her disguise, with purple eyes glared angrily at the three. Her curved antenna twitched as she stood there.

"The grumps here," Black Mage whispered to Travis.

"Hi Pix," Meatwad shouted, waving his meat arm. Pix waved back at Meatwad, but the angry look on her face didn't dissipate.

"Sorry Pix, damn," Black Mage shouted back. "Calm down, it doesn't happen that often."

"Travis, are you ready yet?" Pix asked.

"In a minute," Travis replied.

"Well, I guess we better get going. You have fun with Pix," Black Mage said sarcastically. Meatwad started to pull the cart out of the driveway.

"Remember Black Mage," Travis said as the cart slowly pulled out. "This is a rescue mission, not a 'destroy Florida mission'. Understand?"

"I know," Black Mage replied.

"We need Tallest Red and Purple back alive."

"I know!" Black Mage shouted angrily. "You don't have to tell me so many times. I understand." The cart left the driveway, and slowly proceeded down the street.

"Travis, lets go," Pix shouted from the doorway. Travis walked back into the house to prepare for his journey into space.

* * *

The next day, Osaka was standing in the bathroom she cleaned recently. She gulped as she held a pregnancy test in her hand. 

"It's positive…"

Osaka's face went pale. Then Antasia called, "MARTHA STEWART, GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE!" up the stairs. Osaka sighed and threw away her pregnancy test and went downstairs, where all the other slave-bitches were. When they met like this, it meant that there was someone new Antasia captured.

Antasia smirked evilly.

"We have one new slave-bitch, fucktards! I'm sure you're all familiar with Erica!"

"Erica?" they all said, in confusion.

Antasia chuckled a little and turned around to face another room.

"ERICA, GET IN HERE RIGHT FUCKING NOW!"

"Ugh…"

And out stepped Eddy in a maid outfit like the Tallests, Zoey, Yotsuba, Rini, Squee, Zim, Osaka, and Davis were in. Yotsuba gasped and everyone else got a bit shocked. Yotsuba ran over to him. Momoko was at Antasia's friend's house playing, by the way.

"Shit! Don't tell me she caught you too!"

"Yep. This bitch caught me trying to save you last night. Sockhead and Lumpy ran away before she could get to them," Eddy said.

"You tried to save me? Oh, Eddy…I LOVE YOU SO GODDAMN MUCH, YOU MORON!" Yotsuba told Eddy. She was touched her selfish boyfriend tried to save her.

Yotsuba hugged him, but Antasia growled, meaning she couldn't do that. She let go and Eddy was very confused.

"What the fuck?" Eddy said, confused.

"You can't fucking hug your girlfriend! Understand?"

"No! I don't!"

Antasia got mad and whacked Eddy.

"DON'T TALK BACK TO ME, ERICA!" Antasia said, pissed off.

"Yes ma'am." Was Eddy's bitter-sounding reply.

Then Antasia turned to Osaka and gave her a curious look. "Hey, Martha Stewart, why were you in the bathroom for so freakin' long? If you got some gastro problem or something, you should've told me before so I wouldn't have to yell at you to hurry up."

Everyone gave her a weird look.

"When the fuck are you THIS caring?" Tallest Purple and Zoey said at the same time.

Antasia shrugged.

"If you have some medical problem, AND IF I DON'T FIND OUT YOU'RE LYING, I can't expect you to do all that much work!" she said.

Everyone gave her weird looks again. "O…kay…" Davis said.

"Well, do you have gastro problems?"

"No…and ah don't wanna say!" Osaka said.

"YOU HAVE TO, DAMMIT!" Antasia said.

Osaka gulped and turned to Zim.

"Zimmy-kun…ahm pregnant." Osaka told her husband, slowly. Zim screamed, "WHAT?" The others, including Antasia, were trying very hard not to laugh. Zim and Osaka have a slightly overactive sex life, so…

Zim's eye began twitching and a demented smile grew across his face. This began scaring everyone.

"You're…you're pregnant, Osa-chan?" Zim said in a demented tone of voice. Osaka slowly nodded and Zim began chuckling insanely. The chuckling turned into hysterical laughter quickly and Zim ran up to Davis and Rini and hugged them. "HELLO!" he screamed at them. Then he kissed them Bugs Bunny style. Davis and Rini were wide eyed and were disturbed beyond belief. Tallest Red, Eddy, Yotsuba, Zoey and Squee were cracking up. Tallest Purple and Osaka were speechless and weren't amused by this behavior. Antasia ran out of the house, very disturbed, by this time.

Then Zim went up to Eddy and Yotsuba and Zim gave Eddy a condom.

"USE IT, EDDY! I APPARENTLY DON'T GIVE MUCH OF A SHIT TO PUT ONE ON, SO IT'S ALL YOURS! SCREW MY DAUGHTER, I DON'T CARE!" Yotsuba was mortified, beet red and shocked by her dad's statement. She knew he's just gone crazy, but it's still shocking.

Eddy, on the other hand, was grinning. He turned to Yotsuba and said, "You heard the man!"

Yotsuba shook her head, "Not until we're older!" Eddy moaned.

"COME ON! YOUR DAD SAID IT WAS FINE!"

"No! My parents began screwing when they were teenagers and look how THEY turned out!"

Eddy thought about that for a minute then grew mortified himself. "Uhh…forget what I said…there's no way in hell if we ever get married that I'm having seven kids! I'd friggin' die! And worse, they might all turn out like YOU!" Yotsuba smirked.

"Wise decision." she told him.

Squee gave his grandfather a weird look after he was done singing to Zoey, Tallest Purple, Osaka and Tallest Red.

"SQUEE, grandpa! Are you SQUEE okay?"

"Hell yeah! I'M FINE, MOMOKO!" Zim said, insanely.

"I'm SQUEE Squee, grandpa!" Squee told him.

"WHATEVER!"

And for the rest of the day, they watched Zim go nuts. That night, Tallest Red woke up and noticed Yotsuba wasn't in her bed. After quietly looking around the house, he found her in the pool enclosure in the backyard.

"What the hell are you doing out here, Yotsuba-chan?" Tallest Red asked, quietly.

Yotsuba turned to them. "I couldn't sleep. I don't think I slept in four days in this hell hole," she told him. Tallest Red sat down next to her and smirked. He told her, "I thought with your beloved Eddy to protect you that you'd be around you would be able to sleep! Damn!"

Yotsuba punched Tallest Red in the back, playfully. They stayed up for a little while longer, talking, before they went to sleep.

* * *

Sanoon – And the month-long journey has started. Take a guess how many people Black Mage will destroy. You might be right. Stay tuned for future nuttiness. 

Animefreak84 – Will Zim continue to be stupid? Will the other Ed's be captured? Will Momoko come back and be cute again? Will I stop asking questions? I dunno...


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